For Family and Friends: How to Support Someone in Therapy
The most helpful things you can do for someone in therapy are to respect their privacy, show steady interest without pressure, help with practical barriers such as childcare or transport, and look after yourself. You don't need to become their therapist or know the right thing to say. If you're trying to encourage someone to start therapy, gentle, specific observations and practical help usually work better than urging them to "get help".
Encouraging someone to consider therapy
If you're worried about someone who hasn't sought help, here are some approaches that tend to help.
Choose a good moment
Pick a private, relaxed time, not in the middle of an argument or when they're rushing out the door. Side-by-side settings, such as a walk or a drive, can feel less confronting than face to face.
Lead with care and specifics
Rather than "You need therapy", try describing what you've noticed and why you care:
"I've noticed you've seemed really flat lately, and you haven't been to netball in weeks. I'm worried about you."
"You've mentioned a few times that you're not sleeping. How are you going, really?"
Listen more than you talk
Let them share at their own pace. Resist the urge to fix, correct or reassure too quickly. "That sounds really hard" is often more helpful than advice.
Normalise help-seeking
Many people worry that therapy means something is seriously wrong with them. You might mention that lots of people see a psychologist for stress, relationships, parenting or life changes, or share your own experience if you're comfortable.
Offer practical help
Barriers are often practical. You could:
help them find a psychologist or read practitioner bios together
offer to mind the kids during sessions
drive them to a GP appointment for a Mental Health Treatment Plan
mention options such as telehealth, which removes travel, or Walk and Talk therapy, which some people find less intimidating
Respect their choice
Unless there's a risk to safety, the decision is theirs. Pushing too hard can make someone dig in. You can leave the door open: "If you ever want help finding someone, I'm happy to help."
What therapy can and can't do
Having realistic expectations helps you support someone well.
Therapy can:
help people understand their thoughts, feelings and patterns
teach practical skills for managing anxiety, low mood, stress and emotions
help process difficult experiences, including trauma and grief
improve relationships and communication
support people through big decisions and transitions
Therapy can't:
fix everything quickly. Change usually takes weeks to months, and progress often isn't linear
make someone feel better after every session. Therapy can stir things up, and people sometimes feel more emotional before they feel better
change another person. Therapy works on the person attending, not the people around them
replace crisis or emergency services
Supporting someone who's already in therapy
Respect their privacy
Therapy is confidential, and what your loved one shares about it is up to them. Avoid asking for details of what was discussed. A simple "How are you feeling after today?" leaves room for them to share or not.
Don't take it personally
People in therapy sometimes explore relationships, including with family and partners. They may start setting boundaries or changing how they respond to you. This can feel uncomfortable, but it's often a sign of healthy change. If you're concerned, talk to them directly or consider your own support.
Support new habits
Therapy often involves practising new skills between sessions: going for walks, trying new routines, facing avoided situations, or setting boundaries. Encouragement and patience help.
Avoid "Are you better yet?"
Recovery takes time. Asking whether therapy is working can add pressure. Notice and acknowledge small changes instead.
Help with the practical side
Offering childcare, time and space for sessions (especially telehealth at home), or covering household tasks can make a real difference.
When a loved one is a new parent
If someone close to you has a new baby and is struggling, practical help such as meals, taking the baby for a walk, or protecting their sleep can be as valuable as emotional support. Read Postnatal Depression and Anxiety: Signs and Support to learn what to look out for.
If you're worried about their safety
If someone tells you they're thinking about suicide, take it seriously. Stay with them if you can, ask them directly (asking about suicide doesn't increase risk), and help them get support:
000 if there's immediate danger
Lifeline: 13 11 14 (24/7)
Suicide Call Back Service: 1300 659 467 (24/7)
Beyond Blue: 1300 22 4636
If they're already seeing a psychologist, encourage them to let their psychologist know.
Looking after yourself
Supporting someone you love can be draining, so look after your own needs too:
keep up your own routines, rest and interests
set limits on what you can offer
talk to someone you trust
seek your own support if you need it. Therapy can help carers and family members too
Carer Gateway (1800 422 737) offers free support for people caring for someone, including emotional support and counselling.
How Satya Psychology can help
If someone you care about is thinking about therapy, you're welcome to share this page with them, or point them to our team page to find someone who feels like a good fit. We offer telehealth across Australia, in-person sessions in Nobby Beach, and Walk and Talk therapy on the Gold Coast. You can also book a session for yourself.
This article is general information and isn't a substitute for individual advice.